Monday 25 April 2016

U is for UNUSUAL


Living on the Goldie as I do, I am very used to the long stretches of white white squeaky sand beach, and people wandering around in bugger all clothes most of the year and then on the 2 days of winter they don their full cold clobber including long boots and all manner of furry coats and gloves and hats. I have spent time wondering where exactly they keep all this shit cos it's not oft used and there is not usually any loft space in homes, to chuck it into, so I guess it hangs in cupboards surrounded by summer singlets and thongs and just feels very out of place.

But the Great Southern Ocean is far removed from the Pacific Ocean and the Goldie. It is wonderful in it's unusualness.

The beaches are mostly brown cold sand, edged by very dramatic rock wall cliffs, and the water is cold. Not chill-blain leg cramping cold like in the UK in Newquay in the winter where Belly and I almost lost all use of our legs, but still it's pretty cold, so the crazy swimmers are all wearing their wet suits even if they are just dipping in a toe or 2. The really unusual thing I have discovered here on the southern coast, is that wet suits do in deed come in a variety of sizes, even big enough to accommodate bodies which are frowned upon in public on the all too often pretentious, skinny Goldie. These must almost certainly must be housed in the garage as they could well smell of piss and salt cos I have heard that everyone wees in 'em to keep themselves warm. How very unusual.

The Great Ocean Road has been built to give tourists full view of the wonderful diverse landscape. It is bloody brilliant and if you fancy going for quite a bit of a drive, then make sure you give yourself enough time to call in at all the lookout points, or at least most of 'em, cos they are worth a look. Please leave the selfie sticks and the fucking moronic need to climb in with the snakes amid the unstable cliff tops, in your car, and just take a moment to smell the salt and listen to the crash of the waves.

Seriously the number of people who grabbed a selfie and took off, just ticking another destination off the list, was staggering and ultimately I was looking for a shovel to smack 'em with. All too often walking 4 abreast and expecting everyone else to move, or wait til they had taken their stupid pictures - yep, I have had enough of tourists. The good thing about the list tickers is that they are not too long at any destination so if you wait a few seconds they move away and you have a wonderful view all to yourself until the next wave of selfie obsessed loons arrive.

I have thoroughly loved every part of the coast down here.

Of course it's the ANZAC Day Long weekend and today started with a service at the memorial at Lorne. I was lazy in the extreme and watched from the balcony of my place while I warmed my hands on my mug of tea. My fortune, by comparison to our Diggers was not lost on me.

Lest We Forget.


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