Thursday, 31 July 2014

Mummy and the Dentist

peddling cartoon humor: 'When I got to the dentist, there was a sign that said 'no peddlers', so I got back on my bike and came home.'

I spent a lovely day with Bell yesterday...well some of it was lovely and some of it a bit shitful really.

When Belly was a child her father sent her off to the dentist on her own for what he said would just be a little check-up, but she came home with the terrifying news that she needed to have 4 teeth unceremoniously ripped out. This happened in hospital and was all quite traumatic, but the ultimate upshot is that she never went back to the dentist again.

Some weeks ago she let slip that a bit of tooth had sprung loose and that she had a bit of pain. She said that she had made an appointment at the free dentist place but she would have to wait for about 6 months for a date with the possie of practising dentists.

This wasn't good enough I didn't reckon so I sat on the phone til I made an appointment at a place nearby and said I would be there to hold her hand.

Well that offer might well have been the bravest most motherly thing I have ever made.

I too am terrified of going to the dentist. The explanation is a long turgid story of gore and incompetence that I wont go into, but suffice to say, I now go to my bloke who I have trained up nicely. I have a panic attack every time I go. I shake and my eyes leak and my fella knows that he just has to ignore me and carry on and if he is actually hurting me he will know cos I will elbow him hard in his bits. All other reactions are to be ignored.

So when I offered to go with Bell, I was concerned that I might be less than useful.

The first time was HUGE! There was a walloping needle and a lot of drilling and phaffing and I held her hand and counted her breathing in through the nose and out through the mouth and roused on her and told her to get a grip and that if she didn't get a grip, she'd pass out and fall of the chair. Honestly, it was like coaching a baby out of a reluctant mother.

I sounded like some crazy bitch banshee. I was pleased there was no one in the waiting room. I sucked it up and actually watched the whole procedure.

Yesterday we went back for round 2 and it was more of the same except that there were people in the waiting room. I can only imagine what the 2 old people were thinking as they sat there waiting to have their teeth whitened.

I think we only have to go back once more and that is just for a little look at gums. I hope Bell will go in on her own, cos she will have to manage it at some point and she will have to be able to hold Zig's hand too. That of course could be the making of her as mine of her could be for me.

I reckon my bloke might well be more than a little surprised next time I am unlucky enough to have to see him.

Apart from all this, I am left wondering, who the bloody hell would ever choose to be a dentist?