Friday, 23 January 2015

Love Scammers





I pay very little attention to all that bollocks that is paraded around as 'Current Affairs' on the tellie. There seems to be far too little integrity in the reporting and nearly always an ulterior motive in the big push. Shit half the time the stories are about what is coming up next, so just a glorified ad for something on the tellie, not a hard hitting news investigation. Thankfully I am usually cooking the dinner while this babble goes on, but last night, even the lure of salad making and other domestic crap could not cover the noise of yet more women scammed by love rats for huge amounts of cash.

I stopped and had a look. Fuck me, these women look normal enough. Why had they put their brains in a box and given away all their money to men they had not even met? Beggars belief!

Now most women have been on hilarious dates with somewhat suspect characters. I reckon most of us could fill a good size note book with strange and sometimes bizarre accounts. Years ago I did a stint of online dating. I'd make arrangements to meet up always in a public place and always had a 'get out of jail free card' in the form of going to pee but really sending a text to a girlfriend who would call with a pretend emergency so I could beg off quickly if things were going badly. Yes I did this a few times. No, I don't think it made me a bad person.

I have been on 'half a first date' more times than I fancy remembering. Second dates were far far fewer. Maybe I am just blessed with a finely tuned bullshit barometer and was never desperate to give away my independence to take up with some jolly old wanker who thought I wouldn't notice he was 8 inches shorted than his profile read or that his piccie was from 1962.

I happily paid for myself and I am sure there were the odd times when the fella might have, 'left his wallet at home' so I might have sprung for an extra coffee or a beer, but if a request was made for large piles of wonga, well I would have fallen off the chair laughing, and would have told 'em to fuck off as I wiped the giggle tears from my face.

I just know that there would be NOTHING in the written word from these scammers that would entice me to empty a bank account or even make an enquiry about my super funds. Well really anyone who knows me would know that I'd have been too busy looking for grammatical errors and there wouldn't have been any secrets. Friends would have all seen this shite and dissected every word, and even if, by some remarkable miracle which saw me transported to the land of crazy, I had been completely swept away, these people would have been there as voices of reason and a blockade at the banks doors.

Where were these women's friends?