Friday, 6 January 2017

Job Satisfaction

Window washing is right up there on my list of what I don't want to do for a living.

There was a story circulating this week about some worker at a childcare centre, suing the employer cos she hurt her back changing a nappy. I didn't read more than the headline, so there could possibly have been some slim justification for the ridiculous sum being sought, but I rather doubt it. Me, I reckon I would be more likely to go after 'em cos of the assault on the olfactory senses or maybe a pulled stomach muscle from the dry retching, but I have changed enough nappies to not be worried about back ache. I can only imagine that looking after other people's babies could not have been high on this gal's list of dream jobs.

So I was given to wondering which jobs I would LEAST like to do.

My Lovely girl was sent, presumably as some sort of disastrous punishment, once to slop out food prep bins with industrial strength bleach and shit. There was no provision of safety gear, not even a pair of gloves and she was told that if she failed to attend work, her benefits would be stopped immediately. It seemed in its wisedom, Centrelink had registered her with a job search agency which specialised in finding work for MEN on PAROLE, and whilst I am not saying these fellas deserved this sort of work, I AM saying that my girl did definitely not! I remember it getting all very ugly and blessed be, that fucking place was closed down. I like to think that all the letters of complaint I wrote might have had something to do with the lockout, but who knows.

Anyway that job might be close to the top of my list.

I also don't ever want to have to clean up other people's bum holes, or vomit or pee, although if I had to choose, I would opt for the pee. I must have lived a charmed life as a teacher cos not once did a kid ever puke in my room. That would have no doubt set off a chain reaction, and generally speaking there was only ONE department issue waste bin per room, so that could have filled up quite quickly - yep let's change the subject, and I taught my girl to make it to the loo as soon as she could walk, so puke clean up appears nowhere on my CV.

We had window washers in this week in preparation for the fucking open houses over the next 3 weekends. In general I reckon this would not be the top of my YUK list, until I saw Stewie hanging from the ladder 30 feet up whilst giving specific complicated directions to someone ON THE PHONE. Nope, I don't want to be scaling a fucking ladder and wedging my body into the rungs in such a ways as to allow louvre polishing and phone chatting. Truly my toes are curling at the very thought.
Hasn't Stewie done a fine job?

I am guessing there are lost more jobs that I would just hate, in fact as I am a lazy don't work cow, the list is too long for me to bother recording. But these are a good start.

So how about you? What jobs do you want to avoid?