Needles.

Yeh these are the only needles I can bare to touch. Lucky I am not Diabetic!

So today I learnt that I am just fucking useless in a needle crisis.

Stevie was at the specialist for a look-see at what hurts him and the bloke who was all very jolly and pleasant said that a big fuck off needle was called for and that he'd do it NOW. Well Stevie was all very sanguine about it and Dr T said it would be good if I sat in with him and held his hand, and I walked into the Needle room with best intentions, but when the ultra-sound machine was pushed in and the needle container was swished about, and forms were signed and all was in readiness, I bottled out. I wanted to steal some of the jelly beans from  the jar, but rightly figured I hadn't earned them.

Fucking useless wimp that I am.

Now I have had more needles than would be blunted sewing a canvas tent big enough to cover the Gold Coast and its hinterland. Yep, I reckon if all the times I had been punctured were done at once in the one place, say into my belly,  I would have just a great big hole in that spot, big enough for the doctors to shake hands through as they congratulated each other about how I had enabled them to send all their kids to private schools and then pay their HECs fees.

So needles are not foreign to me, except that I NEVER look at 'em. I don't watch 'em sitting in the little green kidney bowl waiting to be used, and I sure as shit don't look at 'em as they are shoved into my skin. I can't watch that shit in person or on the make believe hospital shows on the tellie. Really it surprises me that I can change the sewing machine needle or thread one to sew on a button. So unfortunately today, I had to do a runner....what a fucking coward! I sat outside, but could still hear the conversation so I ran further afield to the loo...Ah Escaped.
 
I hope that if push ever does come to shove that I will be able to 'woman-up' and look after him, but I reckon I will always need a bit of time to get my head around it all, and with any luck at all there might be time to do a proper reccie to source a perching spot where vision of the actual needle shoving procedure is hindered by bodies. Today I would have been closer than Stevie and it was going into HIS shoulder.....ooooh yukkie!

He was a brave little soldier! And I did what all good generals do, and that is cheered from the sidelines, far far away.