Tuesday, 10 December 2013

Parcels Parcels Everywhere




It must be more than a little shitful to have a birthday close to christmas. The shops are full of stocking stuffers and who wants their stockings stuffed for their birthdays. The birthday cards take a back seat – quite literally in some shops, to the gaudy snowy Santa ones. And surely I am not on my own in that I just barely have the will and the energy to fill the Santa lists, without having to rack the old grey matter to find something birthdayified and not remotely christmasy so it is clear that you have made an effort worthy of another year. So folk who have birthdays in December are at a bit of a disadvantage I reckon.

I used to have a present cupboard where I would store things that I’d buy on speck thinking that they would be good as a parcel for someone, at sometime, but that storage facility closed up shop years ago, after I looked in and found watches and expensive stuff that I didn’t like at all, so how was I ever gonna give it away to anyone else.

I reckon the best parcel buying is done under pressure. It’s amazing just what fabulous stuff you can find when your feet are aching and your eyesight is failing and if one more chipper salesperson glances in your direction you might hit ‘em with your handie.

A couple of parcel hunting hints.

1.      Get an early start so you can find a good parking spot.

2.      Go to a Mall where there is airconditioning and coffee shops at reasonable intervals.

3.      Begin with coffee and maybe some carbs.

4.      Wear comfortable shoes and remember your glasses.

5.      Look for inspiration in odd places.

6.      Avoid ‘up-sellers’ like the plague.

7.      When your hands are full, GO HOME.